11:19 pm on Tuesday July 15, 2008
| Posted by Ken Hawkins
Bad behavior makes for bad nights, amusing court dates
Image by flickr user ninjapoodles (background added to widen image)Image by 20080716drunkcruisin.jpg Drinking like this leads to good times, but get busted and you'll have a hefty fine to go with the hangover.
When a story about a surfer's court date fell through, the rest of the court's defendants got their own special write-ups. You'll really have to read their whole story for the full effect, but here are some highlights to sway you (the names listed aren't their real names, to protect the could-be innocent and all):
- Anthony — charged with open container, resisting arrest, and littering
"You didn't have anything besides a tank top?" asks the arresting officer as Anthony, a cook at a local seafood restaurant, approaches the judge's stand in a black, sleeveless shirt, tattoos emblazoned on his arms. The officer testifies that he spotted the subject walking down Center Street with an open can of Mickey's, and that he then ran behind the ice machine next to Woody's Pizza before having to be "taken down by force with a Taser." Despite the electroshock therapy, Anthony was cited and released because the cops "were really busy that day." Judge Kachmarksy fined him $200 for each of the three charges, to be paid on Monday.
Pepper's already made everyone double-take when he shuffles into court in handcuffs and a striped jump suit after spending nine days in jail. He pleads innocent, and the judge offers him a bench or jury trial. "Which do you prefer?" asks Pepper, who the cops say frequently sleeps at the city park. The judge tells Pepper he's been in here "hundreds" of times, and wishes he'd stay out of trouble. This time, he was arrested on the pier, surrounded by a Styrofoam cooler of beer cans and dead crabs, and cursing around a family, all of which he denies. "Two times ago I let you go, and last time I saw you I gave you 60 days," says the judge. "This time I'm going to let you go, and we'll just take turns like that." "There is a God," says Pepper.
Folly Beach's privately hired meter maids aren't very popular. Paid parking is still new to the beach, and people are slow to accept change that costs them money. Susan's one of those parking attendants, and she's in her uniform when she takes the stand for not paying two tickets that have compounded since being issued in January. Even the police hide a chuckle.
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